Saturday, August 17, 2013

My Untitled Poem :P

Hey guys,

I sit here and cringe as I type, thinking of how disappointed some of you must be. The summer has nearly come to an end and I've done NOTHING!!!! I am soooooooo sorry about that guys. To be honest, I've been dealing with some stuff at home that has pretty much put my brain on hold as it applies to creative expression, such as writing, but you know what? I'm gonna slap myself in the face and tell myself to pull it together.

Anyhow, as you can see from the title, I've written a poem. This is... very unusual for me. To be completely honest, poetry is that looming dark cloud that I've tried to hide from. In English at school, when my teacher tells us to pull out our poetry books to analyze poems, I feel like everything inside... drops. It's a sinking feeling like my body decided to melt into the tiles under my feet. I guess my mind is to literal to understand a full body of text that says one thing and means another. That's why I can go a full term with grades ranging 90 - 100 % and get a nice little 60% to put me in the 80% range... awesome :/.

As for writing poetry, I find it like song writing- extraordinarily painful and frustrating. I haven't even attempted to try writing one for a year or so. So imagine my great surprise when I sat down at midnight last night and these words spilled out onto a page of my journal with stanzas and a rhyme pattern. It was amazing to ME at least, and I immediately thought "first thing tomorrow- this gets posted." The problem that I've faced is finding a title- A TITLE, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!! Why is this one simple thing the hardest thing for me to create. It's just remarkable how I was able to sit down and create a poem that's worth sharing, but the thing that I've always been able to do just isn't coming to me. I really can't understand it. Anyhow, maybe ya'll can help me by posting titles that you've thought of or, better yet, a certain BEST FRIEND of mine who is a poem junkie could offer me a few creative suggestions (hint hint, Miss Amber White). LOL, well here goes nothing; I now present you with my untitled poem. Hope you enjoy :)


***


It's almost disgustingly humorous how I'd thought it would last,
This deeply dark and mysterious thing I had cast.
Something most people can't get enough of;
Something we heathens call LOVE.

Heathen you say? Why's that?
Because we've shut our mind to reality, our hearts to the facts;
Because if we were truly believers we would have understood
That this rosy pink demon would prick us all if it could.

To those who see its thorns and still extend a hand to pick this,
I feel pity, for they don't realize that it's a trap for sickness...
A deep seeded hole by which love is planted
Into hearts of those whose veins demand it;

Demand that hot rush, hot flush of cheeks when that lover walks by,
Sick, sick, sickening a cell, growing anemic to the irony that reddens this high.

But I must admit, love smells light and sweet,
A scent that strengthens when me and another meet.
The roots extend deeper and embed itself deep into our skin,
Making us feel airy, weightless and thin;
Floating away so quickly that I wasn't not even aware
of everything and everyone I'd left behind down here.

Down here, back on Earth where stems began to shoot upwards against the gravity
And lives began to change as we dreampt about you and me.
We felt this budding relationship bloom and we planned it's future,
but we felt some new wounds that we then tried desperately to suture.

Holes ripped into soft skin
By vicious thorns, snaking from hate, one of love's kin.

We held on for way too long,
Tightening our grip on this tainted whip...

But now as I unfold my fist I've found
A withered rose, petals of deep red turned brown.
And as if trying to revive what's left,
Tears fall to my palm, but not even my rain could be that deft;

Not skilled enough to return which was never meant to be,
Dreams of you and me that should've just BEEN dreams of you and me.
And to this day, it haunts me to close my eyes at night,
And see him take a hold of me, watching me melt without a fight
Because it's easier to feel what's not physically there
Than it is to be so close and fall victim to the fear...

Fear? Fear of what?
Fear of falling hard with no chance of getting up.

So instead I abstain from the beliefs of the unbelievers
And preach the gospel of my past,
Regretfully watching others' roses bloom
Wishing that mine had had the strength to last...


Love Always <3,
Katrina Lowell

Friday, June 28, 2013

Summer in Style

Hey readers,

Well as I said in an earlier post, I've been doing some shopping here in the USA and before I began my summer I sat down and thought, "You know what Katrina? You are always going in places, grabbing random crap, trying it on and buying it- how cool would a THEME be?" and that's when I decided that I was going Vintage...

Well, It did take a little more thought than that before I finally decided on an old fashioned chic style. I considered just a full blown tomboy swag like Rihanna. Then it occurred to me- I'm not Rihanna and that look probably won't be pulled off by Katrina Lowell any time NOW or in the future... I guess what attracted me most were the shoes and snapbacks- I love both.
Rihanna in her "Tomboy Swag" at a Lakers Game- You go girl!

The shoes- Gosh, where do I begin? I love Vans and Converse and any type of shoe that fit like Toms; the ones that you can just slip on and just strut. They're just mega cool. Then there are THE SHOES- the sneaker/ high heel combination that just threw me into fits of fantasy INSTANTANEOUSLY... I just love the shoes...
These van's are studd-ing... That was a pun by the way :/
The paint splatters on this shoe are just so awesome looking- almost like a unicorn exploded :P
I love animal prints on ANYTHING, so the animal print and the rainbow color scheme is kinda cool...


I don't really know what this is and I like it because of that- it looks like something I would draw...
I like anything with a statement- How much you wanna bet Amber could write a poem instantly about this shoe? LOL
What girl doesn't like Wonder Woman?

YOU SEE THEM??? They're perf!
Once again, the animal print. Me gusta!

The Snap backs- Why am I slightly obsessed with these hats? I don't know; I just like to see them. They're just... I don't know. My mom hates them, especially on girls, but I mean, Look at Rihanna guys... She looks mega swag in her snap back- nuff said...

Just the basic snap back statement of swag- the usual...
I almost forgot about these guys- this would be my very first buy...
"YMCMB HOODIE HOODIE" LOL, comment if that rings a bell....


Ok, well that was the end of that idea and I moved onto my closet to see what I had that I really liked and that's when I saw my "Monteau" elephant dress... the dress that makes me feel like the cutest thing ever when I wear it. And that's when it hit me- what if I dressed like that everyday? I was dead set on the Vintage style from then and there.

This comes with a little white belt and its just sooo adorbz...

So with vintage there are a few basic components that I look for- button-up collars, lace, long- sleeves with cuffs, antique patterns, dresses with a "wide midriff", simple and somewhat vintage sneakers and finally the cool hairstyles. These all, to me, accentuate the things that make me beautiful and that's what matters the most to me. I also like to accessorize with big secretary glasses which make my nose look smaller (LOL) and bags with cartoon characters with an old fashioned theme. These things all make me me and that's why I chose vintage this year.

The collars- I like the button-up collars because they, for one, make my neck look a little longer. My beloved grandmother passed down her neck to me and, at times, it can make me look like I only have a head and shoulders :/, but that's my body and I'll work with it :). So these collars are just my solution. So far all of my shirts have tight collars and I love them- they also really bring in that 1900s chic style into light...
They call the swooping collar a "Peter Pan" collar. I think it's pretty cute :3
This one is simple yet unique.
The bright colors of this top are immediately attention grabbing... for me at least.

The Lace- Lace was a big part of the old fashioned  look- I like the more cottony lace rather than the thin lace like doilies. I especially like it at the back or the side of the dress or shirt... It just makes it look like a versatile article of clothing instead of the everyday one-fabric article,

The lace in some of these dresses immediately make them stand out against the ones without them. I especially like #4 with the white lace over that beautiful fuchsia color underneath.  
I like how both lace and the Peter Pan collar are incorporated in this top.
This one, although not my preferred type of lace, is really cute and dainty. It gives it an antique type of look.

The Long Sleeves- I'm not sure how popular these shirts were back then, but the look is modernly vintage and I like it- The long sleeves with the cuffs make me look a little more mature and add a little more chic to the look. No real other reason besides that.. I just love em'.
Forget the cuffs in this one- You see the gold border on her collar! Beautiful :)
On this model the shirt has kind of lost its femininity, but the top is pretty nice.
I love this ensemble- Vintage? probably not but Glam? Most definitely!

Patterns- This usually applies to my pants. I know back then, the MEN wore the pants in the relationship, but my addiction to skinny jeans is gonna prevent that from happening. Luckily for me, a few years back, patterned skinnies came out for the fall and I'm in love with them. I also like kooky patterns in my shirts and dresses, like my elephant dress :) just to make it a little more fun...
These washed-out jeans are unique and attention grabbing- me gusta!
I wish these were longer and not the cut offs, but  I like the pattern and so I'd probably try these on...
I AM SEARCHING FOR A PAIR OF THESE SO BADLY! I found some but I want THESE!
This outfit is very cute and vintage teacher-y. I like the shirt the most...
This. Shirt. Is. BEAST!
This whole picture is just right on point. The shirt is really different and eccentric. I dig it.
 

Dresses- I have understood and embraced my body shape from an early age- I have quite a bit at the top and quite bit at the bottom with a significant curve in my waist. I like to wear dresses that emphasize my waistline and hips without drawing too much attention to the top. I don't have any qualms with that area of my body, but I do admire how vintage clothes were modest enough to hide the cleavage white still highlighting a feminine shape. That's why I like the "wide waistine" shaped dresses where it comes in at the waist but goes out at the hip. It's just another thing about vintage that I have grown to love...
Although the term is "wide waistline," I like them like this, where it curves in at the waist just slightly and drops down  a little wider. It's just really nice looking...
Once again a Peter Pan Collar- I love this dress for the layers though and the floral print. The color is nice as well- a great fall dress.
Most of these dresses are ones that I would wear, although these offer some  cleavage, but hey as Amber would tell you, cleavage isn't always bad.


Shoes- I prefer sneakers, like Toms, Converse and Vans, so I told myself that I'd just incorporate simple black and white ones, or even ones with vintage patterns and themes in them. It works perfectly :)
I love the black at the front and the vintage floral at the back- I'll be hunting these down.
My new bag has these guys on them and I think the vintage Minnie and Mickey are just the cutest things ever.
At first I was like "ummmm- that looks like weed,' but upon a closer look, I saw that it was just a bunch of leaves. Personally, because of my first impression, I wouldn't wear them but... hey, why not...
THESE SHOES!
I like these type of slip on shoes. I have some jeans ones that are falling apart and I need a replacement pair FAST!
I really like these ones- the color scheme is pretty...
I actually have these exact shoes in a lavender/grayish color  but they're pretty dirty becuase I wore them to a concert and it rained and I got mud on them :/ I wore them today with a vintage dress and it kinda ruined the look...
Are these unique? Yes. Would I know how to wear these? Probably not.


Hairstyles- The sign of class; I'll let it speak for itself...
It was all about the curl back then...
First of all this picture is gold- second of all, I love how the curls at the front look like a bow at this angle- cute!
I'm dying to get a bandanna just to try out this style...
Here she is again- this time with a vintage low bun of which I would like to try out soon...
Lana Del Ray- forget the hair; have you ever seen anyone with more perfect lips? Like seriously, how was she born with those? People PAY for those....

I've never had like a "favorite brand" or anything, but I must say that when I'm shopping, I look on every tag for "Monteau." That brand is just perfect when it comes to retro mod vintage and their styles are not only old fashioned, but unique and I just love it. Here are a few of their clothes-

Well that's my summer style- I must say that I've very pleased with it. I'm excited when I go shopping and I'm constantly getting new ideas. I encourage you guys to establish your summer styles and try something new; it can be nerve wreaking at first, but then you get into a groove and wearing the clothes becomes a fun thing to do. Trust me ;)

Well, I've spent all night on this post, it is now almost 12:00 a.m. and so I'm gonna go ahead and get some beauty sleep...Goodnight (or rather good morning) readers!

Love Always <3,
Katrina Lowell